Cinnamon rolls for a Christmas party
So the chicken is in the crockpot, relieved of its skin & a few feathers (blech!) & hacked into pieces. The salad & dessert are chillin' in the fridge. The ants have been removed from their meal of crumbs under the dining room table. Saturday night company is coming & we are learning the art of hospitality.
I always knew how much I had to learn. Having guests when we lived in Pennsylvania meant some serious cleaning & food prep. Not that my visitors couldn't've put up with scattered toys & dirty dishes, but I allowed untidy to reach chaos & dishes to reach towering peaks far too often. Shall I give myself grace for having a few small children? Shall I give myself a break for just not having the gift of hospitality? No siree, I should not.
Picture perfect is not the goal, nor is an aseptic shine on the kitchen sink. The goal for me is to be able to tidy, wipe & cook in a reasonable amount of time, leaving my husband free to invite guests without his wife having an anxiety attack & his children lining up for orders on top to bottom cleaning.
Here in Pokuase, the toys are less, the dirt is more, & there are fewer choices on the menu but guests to our home are much more frequent.
God has taught me a lesson about hospitality. Laziness too often got in the way of not inviting someone to our house. I'm ashamed of the opportunities I missed to bless & minister to people around my own kitchen table. The very simple matter of a family prayer, meal & boistrous conversation around the dinner table is something we take for granted. One young man who often joins us is learning to pray with us & join in the fun we have. His father, like so many men here is long gone & we pray God is reaching his heart through the example of godly men like Jon & Adrian.
Here in Pokuase I've learned ( & am learning!), a simple banana bread is enough. I'm using what's in the fridge to serve others, not feeling pressure to create something new & amazing in order to feel like having company.
Hospitality to a Ghanaian is very important. Serving guests & sharing what they have with someone is ingrained in them. Sylvia sells fried yam & smoked fish at a stand down the street from us. She has often said to me " You are invited!" as she holds out her lunch.
Many of our guests are fellow missionaries & good friends. We've also been blessed to host more than a few of you that have been able to travel to see us. We love the laughter & lasting encouragement we feel after an evening with friends.
But our newest brothers & sisters in Christ, the ones we have come to serve, are teaching us the most about hospitality in way that reaches beyond the comfortable fit of our own cultural norms to
true hospitality. A gracious & welcoming spirit that shows-
despite my faux paux- the love of Christ
Here's a few things on hospitality: ~always welcome a guest with a handshake & inquiries about their health & the well being of their family. They expect it even if they are only coming to see Jon- & if I don't go, have asked later why I didn't come out to greet them.
~ They will wait to be told where to sit around the table.
~ Our guests would rarely sit around a table or require utensils, & rarely does a household share a meal together. In their homes, they are served whenever they arrive, eat with their fingers, using a doughy starch to scoop up soup or stew, then go. The cook serves, stays by the charcoal fire to tend the food & then cleans up. Often the women & children eat early to finish clean up by dark.
All that to say, our humble dining room table, chairs & place settings are not their normal.
~They all expect me to serve them the food. Encouraging them to help themselves doesn't seem to translate well & they just like the one who cooked to serve the food!
~ Left hands are considered dirty. Don't touch their child with your left hand, give them change, serve their food or give a friendly wave. All things I've done!
~ They are hesitant to take second helpings unless you offer & serve them.
~ If Ghanaian food is served, several bowls of water are needed for cleaning hands while eating. I forgot this the first time! One of the women graciously dumped her water glass into an extra bowl without ever complaining. :)
~ Speaking of water, cold water is not the best. They are not used to ice water. I guess that is one less thing to worry about. Unless, of course, our guests come from Pennsylvania. :)
~Certain stews or soups are only served with certain starches...I have started the meal by apologizing for knowingly serving the "wrong" foods as I try to please my (sometimes) finicky children & spicy pepper loving guests.
~Many of our friends love to try baked items. An oven is very rare in their communities, so it is a treat for them. They just love banana bread, or a chocolate cake.
But most cookies, any icing or sweeter recipes are left unfinished, just too sweet for their palate. Remember chewing on sugar cane is sweet thing to them! If you've never tried it, think about gnawing on a slightly sweet tasting piece of stringy wood. :)
We have many more things to learn. And we are learning to laugh at our mistakes along the way.
How hospitable are you? I know many of you checked this lesson off the list & are a wlling servant to minister to guests. Those of you who are more like me ;), let's hold each other accountable as sisters. Join me on this journey!
I better get off this chair & get to work...company's coming!
Jon's sister Andrea gave much of her 5 weeks in Ghana to serving the children at the Beacon House. Here she is with Helen. She is an example to us of livin' every day ready!
